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Linux newcomer FAQ

Q: Can I run Windows apps under linux?
A:  With the Wine windows emulator, thousands of titles, but why would you want to?
Q:Is Bill Gates satan?
A: Worse. He's Bill Gates.
Q:Do I have to learn a lot of new stuff?
A: No. You will usually catch on in about two days and be as functional as usual.
Q:Do I have to pay for linux?
A: If you did would I offer free downloads without the need for fear of prison?
Q:Is it faster than windows?
A: If you are using windows 1.0, No. XP, YES! Vista DEFINATELY!
Q:What are some of the benefits of switching to linux?
A 1. no viruses 2. fewer crashes 3. you choose how it will work, not an evil nerd in redmond. 4.  no one is forcing you to upgrade to the latest version. 5. It's got more features and they don't slow you down! 6. You can boot it off a CD thus taking it anywhere. (slower though) 7. It's not evil. 8. It will even run on intel macs! (and some work on PowerPC too)
9. Tweakable. Oh so very tweakable. 10. I can't even list them all!
Q:Can I game on it?
A: Yes, but you need to get that program that lets you run windows apps. Also free, and many many many games are available for linux anyway.
Q:Do I have to delete windows?
A: No, besides it being evil? You can run them both. You will be asked to choose at startup.
Q:What about my documents?
A: You can access your windows drive to bring them over, or if you are smart and don't want windows, back them up on an MP3 player or external hard drive before installing linux.